sameer poem Helppppp

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5 Responses to sameer poem Helppppp

  1. salsabil says:

    There are commas in the beginning of the sentence,
    Needs more suspense .

  2. Cool Jeff says:

    There are commas in the beginning of the sentence. Great use of ellipsis.

  3. meadm says:

    Well done. Amazing use of ellipses. You have used a great simile. Try not to put comers in the front of sentences. I think you could put some more description.

  4. saida says:

    Well done Sameer you used a simile that made me feel how the person feels. You can use different openings instead of using I,it and my . You could use adverbial openings such as: slowly, finally.This will make your writing more exciting.

  5. alespa21 says:

    ,I looked back it was gone, doesn’t make sense when you say ,there it was coming closer, there is a great use of ellipses and a good simile, try creating more suspense. You used , there, three times try using more powerful words to start the sentence.

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