This is good and you did really well but i don’t really understand it and it’s really quick. Also you used oh a lot and the end doesn’t really make sense.
I like the story but it was a bit confusing I think you could have used more detail and I don’t really understand the end sentence. I think you should of checked over your work.
Mae
This is good and you did really well but i don’t really understand it and it’s really quick. Also you used oh a lot and the end doesn’t really make sense.
I like the story but it was a bit confusing I think you could have used more detail and I don’t really understand the end sentence. I think you should of checked over your work.
Mae