THE DAY I MOVED UP

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2 Responses to THE DAY I MOVED UP

  1. knoxe says:

    This is a great story! I love the fact that you added personal feelings like “Why did captain have to challenge him?” You put in all the necessary features of a diary, and really amazing adjectives like ‘dreary’. Maybe you should have added dialogue (speaking parts). Overall, it’s a really great story and I think you should write lots more.

  2. elkha says:

    I like the name you used it just sounds real for a pirate but it will be better if you describe the boat and how the captin looks like so its like listening to a real story I like the name so those are my sigusten.

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