really good jack! Maybe the emotion is scared. I really liked the description you used without saying the actual word. you can improve on maybe instead of saying meanwhile just say the floorboards were creaking.
by Lukas
Well done jack!!You described it very well . I liked the way you said he was shaking and his knees were knocking I also liked the simile you used. Try to use different ways you start your sentences instead of ‘ He……. but well done.
Hi, Jack well done this peace of writing is brilliant. You have included a lot descriptive language e.g. he’s knees were knocking together and unable to speak, floorboards were shaking like leaf. There are a lot of similes. Anyway well done. How would you feel if that was you.
jack I like your blog and the way you wrote his head was shaking until he was unable to speak. you nee/d to improve on sentence starter because you added to much he so I think you can work on that. by zunan
jack I like your blog and the way you wrote his head was shaking until he was unable to speak. you nee/d to improve on sentence starter because you added to much he so I think you can work on that. by zunan your emotion is scard
really good jack! Maybe the emotion is scared. I really liked the description you used without saying the actual word. you can improve on maybe instead of saying meanwhile just say the floorboards were creaking.
by Lukas
Well done jack!!You described it very well . I liked the way you said he was shaking and his knees were knocking I also liked the simile you used. Try to use different ways you start your sentences instead of ‘ He……. but well done.
Jasmine
😉
Hi, Jack well done this peace of writing is brilliant. You have included a lot descriptive language e.g. he’s knees were knocking together and unable to speak, floorboards were shaking like leaf. There are a lot of similes. Anyway well done. How would you feel if that was you.
From your best friend Archie
jack I like your blog and the way you wrote his head was shaking until he was unable to speak. you nee/d to improve on sentence starter because you added to much he so I think you can work on that. by zunan
jack I like your blog and the way you wrote his head was shaking until he was unable to speak. you nee/d to improve on sentence starter because you added to much he so I think you can work on that. by zunan your emotion is scard