This made me laugh; you described the situation very clearly! Well done for using so much ‘direct speech’ in this challenge.
Best wishes,
Mrs T
BISB Belgium
Good work Eden, a really good idea for a story, humour is a great idea.
You’ve used rather a lot of ! try to limit how many you use in such a short piece. Also, I’m not sure Thomas would laugh at his mother when she has hot sauce on her face – that would hurt?!
But – this is a super piece and you have used speech marks well.
This made me laugh; you described the situation very clearly! Well done for using so much ‘direct speech’ in this challenge.
Best wishes,
Mrs T
BISB Belgium
when we read your writing we found it very funny!
I like your creative writing about Thomas’s mum well done!
well done Eden
GREAT WORK!!!!!!
Good work Eden, a really good idea for a story, humour is a great idea.
You’ve used rather a lot of ! try to limit how many you use in such a short piece. Also, I’m not sure Thomas would laugh at his mother when she has hot sauce on her face – that would hurt?!
But – this is a super piece and you have used speech marks well.
Keep writing
Andrew
Team 100wc
Well done eden I really liked it.